Have you had the same best friend since you were in primary school? If you have, you probably have shared more with them than with nearly anyone else. They know your faults and your fears. If that all-important relationship changes when you're a teen, you want to know how to survive a break-up with your best friend.
Some friendships seem to stand the tests of time. Others aren’t so lucky. What may have seemed inconsequential in the past has become very hurtful. You may realise the friend you once had has changed, or maybe you’re the one who changed. No matter the reason why, the following ideas will help you move on after you have to say goodbye to your best friend.
It’s important to acknowledge your pain. Friendships can be as emotionally overwhelming as romantic relationships. And, if you break up with your best friend, you’re going to grieve. You may actually go through similar stages of grief as someone who has lost a loved one to death because that’s basically what has happened - your friendship has died. Allow yourself to grieve. The old saying is true - time does heal all wounds.
Spend time with family after a break-up. Your family loves you for who you are and will stand by you. It’s not unusual to want to be alone after a relationship ends, but your family will understand and know when to pull you into activities and when to leave you alone.
Take time to write out your feelings. Journaling can be very therapeutic. Write down what you’ve learned about yourself through the friendship, how you can view life differently and brainstorm about what you can do differently. Get the feelings out and you’re bound to feel at least a little bit better.
Don’t blame yourself for the break-up. It is a rare relationship that is ruined entirely by one person. Chances are both of you played a part in how the friendship changed and therefore you are probably equally at fault for the break-up. Forgive them and yourself and try to move on.
In many cases a friend can keep you from doing some of the things you like. Now is the perfect time to focus on your own interests. If you gave up ice skating because your friend didn’t want to learn how, why not strap on your skates and hit the ice? You can also take the time to learn something new. Your friendship isn’t going to hold you back, so it’s a perfect time to grow and shine.
Try group activities rather than focusing on one friend for a while. This doesn’t mean you can’t spend time with only one friend, but you need some time to adjust to your new status. Give yourself time to work through the break-up and you’ll be better prepared to delve into a ‘best friend’ relationship again.
No one likes to break up, and doing so with a best friend may actually be more devastating than losing a romantic relationship. The feelings you’ll experience are much the same so let yourself grieve the loss. Before you know it you’ll be ready to begin another close friendship.